Mehn, it's hard to be sexy

How I wish somebody had told me. There is so many things I wish I had known when I was a wee teenage girl.

I would have saved myself so many days of truancy from church. Not because I didn't want to go but because I was scared.

And I remember wishing the pastors on tv would address it so that I'll know what to do.

Mehn, being sexy is dangerous but nobody told me.

I just thought that's how you're supposed to be and that a woman was supposed to be sexy.. boy was I wrong.

But everywhere was full of them, tv, church the magazines, everywhere. Everyone I admired was selling sexy and so I thought... Boy did I want to be sexy... I gots to be Sexy!!

So I bought mini skirts and booty shorts, body hugging dresses, low cleavage tops and bum hugging demons (I mean denims)... And I thought yeah... Bring on the sexy!!

Man, nobody told me that you can't concentrate when you're on display.. Here, there, everywhere... Everybody wants to mate with you (...oops I mean talk to you). Everybody's giving you the eye... Aargh.. I'm trying to worship.

How do you keep your mind focused on God 100% rather then how good you look or who is or is not noticing you?? Boy it's hard to be sexy...

Boy what I thought were simple stares were mating calls.. Mehn its hard to be sexy...

It's when I thought I'd get me a hot and sexy man to complete my sexy look that I realised mehn it's dangerous to be sexy...

He said - We gotta do what sexy people do that I thought boy I'm not cut out to be sexy...

He looked at me doing a sexy dance and said 'show me what you got' ... I ran for me life and I thought man it's hard work being sexy!

Little did I know that I was a challenge to everyone I was trying to show that I was sexy??

Sexy is a lifestyle not just a look... It is dangerous to be sexy!

My hardest lesson learnt?That it puts you in the wrong place at the wrong time, in the wrong hands... Majoring in minor things!!

'Free' school to combat gang culture turned down by Government

The school told officials it had 110 expressions of interest from parents for the 120 places on offer in the first year

By Richard Garner, Education Editor

A plan for a pioneering "free" school aimed at breaking the link between teenagers and gang culture has been turned down by the Government, fuelling concerns that the process for giving the go-ahead to such schools is too bureaucratic.

Diaspora High School in Lewisham is in an area of south London where many teenagers have fallen prey to drugs and gang culture. It has been flooded with applications from parents as a result of its promise to provide their children with three months' guaranteed work experience to avoid them going on the dole and ending up on the streets. Yet it has been turned down by the Department for Education because it failed to satisfy civil servants that it had enough expressions of interest to guarantee 50 per cent of enrolment in its first two years of operation.

The school, which is for three- to 19-year-olds, was asked to give evidence of enrolment into the reception year and first year of secondary schooling.

It plans to operate a two-form entry system of 290 pupils into its reception class and four-form entry into year seven, the first year of secondary schooling. It told officials that it had already had expressions of interest from 110 parents for the 120 places on offer in the first year, with more expected to come, thinking that showed adequate support.

When it received the letter, Kay Johnston, one of two teachers behind the proposal, rang the DfE to say they could easily satisfy the criteria, but was told it now did not want the information. What incensed her and her colleague, Anne Broni, was that the application form specifically stated that they did not want evidence of individual applications to support cases.

"I said, 'What, so you can just lie about it?'" said Ms Johnston. "The answer seems to be 'yes'."

They were also angry that no mention was made of any of the education plans they had outlined in their proposal. Ms Broni accused the department of rejecting the proposal with "patronising flippancy". The letter of rejection said they could reapply next year, and suggested they might like to develop their application.

So far a total of 13 free schools have been approved – including five faith schools, a former independent school – Batley Grammar, and the West London Free school proposed by the journalist and author Toby Young.

The two teachers now plan to write to the Education Secretary, Michael Gove, to urge him to reconsider.

A spokeswoman for the department said: "We have received many excellent applications for 2012 and we have had to prioritise those who we think stand the most chance of success."

* In Scotland 30,000 pupils yesterday received their exams results a day early by mistake. The Scottish Qualifications Authority confirmed that the results were sent out early but that they were correct. Almost 160,000 students were waiting for results of Highers and Standard Grades to arrive today. Some 36,000 pupils signed up to get the results sent to them by text or email and almost 30,000 of those received a text message with their results yesterday. The exam body said it was making inquiries with the external contractor that sends the texts on their behalf.

Nursery to workplace

Pupils at the Diaspora High School would be guaranteed three months' work experience straight after leaving school. The plan is to break the cycle that leads to so many teenagers in its catchment area in Lewisham, south London, becoming involved in gang culture.

Pupils would be given mentors in their preferred field of employment to offer them guidance on a future career. The school, which would take children aged between three and 19, is the brainchild of two local teachers – Kay Johnston, who has taught in comprehensives in south London, and Anne Broni, head of maths at a south London boys' school. It has already recruited mentors from all walks of life, including solicitors, doctors and local firms. It is also planning to operate a skills audit of parents – so it can tap into the expertise in the local community to act as mentors. Interest in the proposed school has now mushroomed with at least 150 parents signing up to send their children to it. "We just want to get the youngsters away from the benefits culture and where that leads," said Ms Johnston.

Why Have we turned God's house into a business school?

Is your church service an awesome motivational service? An amazing personal development center where you get business advice, great tips on how to become wealthy, encouragement to buy property and a constant kick up the bum to do something with your life?

That sounds like a great church, doesn't it?

Well, I have been looking through my Bible and trying to understand the purpose of church.  Is it to motivate people and teach them about Business or is a place of worship where we should be taught how to relate with God, live a righteous life and connect with Heaven?  Just a question (please don't get upset, just hear me out).

Learning about business is good and wanting to do great exploits for the Kingdom is great but is it possible to maintain the sanctity of God's house by maintaining it as a place of prayer?

I know that motivation and business education is great but I don't think it belongs on the pulpit.  There is a place for it just not during a worship service.  Should we not listen to God and leave his house alone as a place of prayer and worship?

Oh don't worry, I don't really believe in the vow of poverty, I know that the righteous should be blessed, it's just about how we go about it that has me concerned.

There is indeed a heritage for the righteous (see psalm 37) and things will sometimes happen that will make us feel frustrated and want to get rich quick in dishonest ways (and then quickly repent....shaking my head)because doing things honestly can often take longer.

Nonetheless I'm pretty convinced that the answer is not in 'grasping after the wind' at all like Solomon said.  Solomon said that he has achieved everything that we are currently chasing after and being encouraged to go after.

Is it wealth, intellectual brilliance, property, wives and girlfriends, fame? All of it and at the end, Solomon said it hit him hard. Very hard that all of it is vanity, a grasping after the wind.

Well I wonder if one of two things will happen while these business schools posing as church carry on teaching business instead of 'helping God's people to pursue righteousness'.

One: is that more and more people will get frustrated and think that the whole christian thing is long because God is unable to make them as rich as they want to be and then head off into world.  Or two, that they will go into the Bible and see for themselves that there is a disparity in what God is saying and what the sunday business schools are teaching.

(Sigh) If the church is teaching get rich and the world is teaching get rich then why does the world need Jesus? Church is about getting to know God (full stop)

 Isn't it? I know it's more than that but for simplicity's sake, did I become born again so that I can become a star with my gift and become wealthy?

Remember I don't think wealth is sinful or wrong, I am wondering why we cannot have business seminar on other days and then be taught about Holiness, Righteousness, understanding the scriptures etc on the worship day be it Saturday or Sunday?

The Pastoral office is about caring for the Soul...isn't it?

2 Timothy 4:2-4
New Living Translation (NLT)
2 Preach the word of God. Be prepared, whether the time is favorable or not. Patiently correct, rebuke, and encourage your people with good teaching.


3 For a time is coming when people will no longer listen to sound and wholesome teaching. They will follow their own desires and will look for teachers who will tell them whatever their itching ears want to hear. 4 They will reject the truth and chase after myths.

Is business, new age and motivation 'The Word'? if the answer is no, does it have a place in worship services?

(Another Sigh) I am so confused!!

There is a crisis at the moment, where lots of people are leaving church and attending new ones that are founded on miracles, signs and wonders.

Please hear me loud and clear, I am not saying this is a good thing, I am wondering if this is evidence that people want God, to feel God, if they are after the spiritual and not new age or motivational talks during Sunday worship services.

Read Psalm 37 with me, what do you think it is saying?

I have come to learn that I will never be able to create my true honest wealth myself.  The kind of wealth with no sorrow or sweating attached.  It is going to be the 'Blessing of the Lord that will make me rich'.  The only catch is that I will have to be patient and observe the commandments...No?

Waiting on God will need me to exercise patience. The Bible (the same psalm 37)says that the meek will inherit the Earth so 'my' blessing is an inheritance and an inheritance is not worked for - Duh!!

Nothing you can do will cause you to get your inheritance before the time you are supposed to.  You getting your inheritance depends on your RELATIONSHIP WITH THE  BENEFACTOR AND YOUR BEHAVIOUR, (staying a family member and not being disowned and therefore being written out of the will), this is what determines you getting your inheritance AT the right time.

So Where are we getting all this do it yourself ideas from?

I naively thought Christ angrily reminded us that His house was supposed to be a house of PRAYER?(Matthew 21:13) Should we be teaching  business and personal development on the sacred day? Should it be part of worship?

Remember, I said that I know that personal development, motivation, business etc are good, positive things which we all need.  The question is whether it should share in our sunday 'worship' service.  Read matthew 21 and come back with a reply for why Christ was so angry that they were buying and selling in his house.

Christ said HE came to win souls (for the lost)
He then trained others and then commissioned them to win others into the kingdom.  Have a read of Matthew 28:16-20.  (Let me know what you think it means)

Wondering what you should be spending your energy and your time teaching from the Pulpit?

Prayer, Prayer, More Prayer, Worship and teaching the scriptures.  More and more people do not even know what the Bible Says but they understand the tenets of money and what Tony Robbins and Les Brown have to say about anything and everything.

Are you hardworking and diligently trying to do great exploits for the Lord? Trying to use your gifts to make it and Get wealthy? You might want to find confidence and peace of mind in what the Bible actually says.

Which is that God himself will do it while you use your gift honestly for him.  You do not have to kill yourself trying but stay diligent in your gift, love the Lord, serve him and follow the commandments.

The Bible says in Psalm 37:37 'The future of the blameless man is peace'.

Not convinced? That's Ok, it's hard to swallow because a lot of contradictory messages are coming from the pulpit and people are confused!! I used to be.

So I encourage you to look at the scriptures for yourself!!  A great place to start is the book of Ecclesiastes.

Trust me You can't think and grow rich in the kingdom - You will only die trying.  Solomon told us and this is what he had to say:

Ecclesiastes 12:13
New International Version (NIV)
13 Now all has been heard;
  here is the conclusion of the matter:
Fear God and keep his commandments,
  for this is the duty of all mankind.

Saggy Boobs

To lose my boobs or not to lose my boobs? What to do...

It's funny how this is what plagued my mind when I was trying to decide whether to breastfeed my gorgeous baby or not when she was born.

I was so consumed by the fear of saggy boobs that I almost said hell no... Who wants saggy boobs in their 20's?

Gosh not me. I want perky boobs that look you in the face... Lol...don't shoot me, I'm just playing with words.

But seriously this was all I was told when I naively told everybody that I wanted to breastfeed my daughter till she was 1. Most people looked at me in shock horror and said why? Are u crazy? There's no need for that, there's formula.

You are going to get saggy boobs, why would you give up your boobs so early in your marriage?

Oh gosh... Saggy boobs, saggy boobs! Do I really want saggy boobs?

I couldnt eat or sleep in the early days, staring down at her while she was breastfeeding at 3 am and I thought how stupid of me! I'm going to lose my husband, lose my boobs,lose my statues quo, lose everything...aaargh!!

Almost 10 months down the lone, a healthy beaming baby later... I'm glad I did not put my saggy boobs anxiety before the health of my child.

I've come to realize that it is a privilege to be able to breastfeed her... Some people can't.
I could sell my breastmilk while some people try all sorts to increase their milk supply.
I've never treated her for any infections since birth except for eczema drama (that's a whole other post)

.... and I find my self thanking God for saggy boobs!!

... I wonder if perky boobs would heal a dying child?? Lol, I know it's silly but just trying to put life into perspective.

Bottom line, everyone scared me and gave me horror stories.  It is as if everyone forgot the power of breast milk and putting your child first...shocking!

- My baby is a helpless, vulnerable dependent baby...needing my good judgement for everything right now.  I must put her first no matter what it does or does not do to me...

Well, I am still trying to find out whether I will get saggy or not get saggy boobs but already, I know that it is the best decision that I have ever made.

Is it?

There are way too many 'Sexy' Christians out there for me...

Your Average Christian??

I am in total shock every time I walk into a church service or conference these days...I always feel like screaming - "What is going on here?".  I can no longer  tell that I am in church by just looking at the people that are present.  


Obviously this is in relation to those of us who should know better not new converts...Those of us who have been in this for years not those who are just coming up! Me included...


Yes I know...somebody somewhere is probably rolling their eyes and saying that the church is a hospital - nobody is perfect, or that you can't judge a person's relationship with God or character with the way they dress...that God looks at the heart or who am I to judge...blah blah blah!


That is all noise to me now...If when you finish getting dress in the morning or in the evening (that's the cool time to go out these days isn't it?) and you look like a video honey or a hot MTV babe then please, nobody needs to tell you its wrong.  


If you look more like the world in transparent leggings, low cleavage tops, micro - mini skirts and figure hugging outfits then I'm sorry you ARE in the world; there is no two ways about it.  


Remember that somebody's daughter or impressionable teenager is watching you and they too cannot see what is in your heart.


And that poor little 14 year old boy who who is sitting behind you in church that has only just reached puberty, he cannot see your heart either.  All he can see are your breasts.....Should he be looking at your breasts?  


I keep wondering why there is no fear, no shame, no feeling of discomfort or unease.  How can everyone be walking around in boob tubes and see through leggins as trousers! I say what is going on?


I am screaming about this because I used to be there a few years ago but the moments when I was dressed inappropriately, I was very uncomfortable and I surely would not have turned up in church in any of those outfits, I was too afraid.


There seems to be another level of boldness at the moment,..

I brought this up with someone and I was told that people are tired of being boring, that the ladies are tired of being single and they want to show the world that christian girls are also fun, sexy, attractive and trendy!!

Hello!!!!! 


Why is it that we have to devalue, cheapen and expose ourselves to be attractive? Why are we trying to show the word we're sexy? 

Why, why, why??


Are we in competition with the world are we trying to complete our assignments and make it to Heaven?

I'm sorry but if I am walking around half naked, with the top of my breasts showing (it is still my breasts) bringing the image of sex to everyone's mind then I am in the world, I look more like the world and are a child of the world (full stop). 

There is no 2 ways about it, this is not a grey area. We only justify it when we want to do it and don't want  to let go. I used to convince myself that this is the way beautiful, attractive people dress and it was validated on the pulpit that Holiness is not about dress sense so it is ok.


So I used to wrestle with the Holy Spirit and turn deaf ears to His corection about it.


I have come to this conclusion: You should not look sexy in public as a Christian (I'm sorry). You should be arousing your husband and seducing him for sex in the bedroom not outside and certainly not in church.  What else does sexy really mean?  Why do I need to look sexy to worship God or to win Souls?


Why should we be in church supposedly there to worship God and our intimate parts are showing? I don't get it? Are our breasts not something that is supposed yo be hidden?  Are our bras not undergarments anymore?  
We cannot even kneel down in church anymore because our skirts, dresses or jeans are too tight? So what are we really dressed for?  


You are dressed to attract male attention!! Am I wrong?


Dress sense is not a Grey area...It is grey because you want to justify your inability to sacrifice seeking man's attention for God's attention.


When I was doing it...I got addicted to the complements, the praise, being center of attention.  The adoring or jealous gazes, the whistles, the looks of admiration, the gravitational pull I seemed to have on everybody...  I WAS PATHETIC!


Can I give it up for God's attention?

And it is funny that Nobody is offering correction anymore...And if they do, we call them 'old school'.  Why?


Tell me, have I become old school?

Some People say the dumbest things!

What joys they are

I am the proud mother of the world's most beautiful baby girl....How my life has changed *sigh*.  She is gorgeous, chubby and has the most adorable smile.  She giggles when I walk into the room, crawls after me when I leave.  She dances to every song she hears and claps her hands when she is delighted.

My world lights up when she smiles and I cannot believe how she makes me feel.

In my eyes, she is perfect...she is healthy, addictive and perfect in all her ways (lol...allow me to dream).

Well, its funny that when she was only 3months old a friend said to me "Oh your little one is so gorgeous, how adorable.  What big beautiful eyes she has.  She  is so big, how cute...just make sure you help her to watch her weight".....*emergency stop*.

I thought ....what??

So I acted like I didn't hear asking her to repeat what she had said.  She then replied with..."she's big so you are going to have to help her to watch her weight".

I knew from then that I had heard it all now.  When is a newborn baby fat or too big?  Can I really predict the weight of my child when they are still just a newborn?
Talk about stamping on a child's self image even before they can say dada.

My cutie was born big is an average size for a healthy baby....

I just found it unbelievable that I have been encouraged to put my baby on a diet.

Should I?

I'm a Virgin but I have Oral Sex

It's funny because I was just thinking about this, then I read a post about it.  I knew I had to blog about it....it's just too funny.

You think because you have not had Vaginal sex that you are still a virgin?  Oh Really?

This is a bit mind boggling for me, I thought it has been named Oral SEX.  Which part of sex did we not read.     Is it not a sexual activity?  Does it not involve sexual organs?

I think I am confused.

So oral sex is not sex?  hmmm

Somebody please enlighten me....